I know we really are hard to understand but I think guys are just as difficult at times. I know a lot of it has to to with the differences between men and women but dang they are hard to understand.
Tonight Guy decided to stop over, really for no reason. I think it's come down to him finding any excuse to stop over which honestly I don't mind. I could tell right away he was in a bad mood, not toward me but in general. Took him a while to relax but once he did it was a nice afternoon of chitchatting. Our small talk has really come a long ways from where neither of us could really open up and everything was awkward. He was only suppose to me over for a little bit while he was waiting to go hang out with some friends of his. Well as soon as he got a phone call saying his friends were running behind, one thing lead to another and well we ended in the bedroom again. He never expected it which made it even better then normal. This was all my decision and it was a great one. As he left he gave me just the deepest hug and kiss, it was mind blowing. For a guy who said he didn't want to be attached and so forth, things have really started to grow.
Tonight we were texting as always and something he said blew me away:
Me: I'm glad things have ended up the way they have
Him: Me too and I have high hopes for the future, which is rare for me
I'm trying not to think too much into that but wow. I'm excited to see that he wants a future with me, what type of future who knows but he see's something with me in it. I know what I feel for him isn't something that is to be ignored. I know it's something that could grow into more, a lot more. I'm still holding back no worries, I'm not ready to let that wall down. It's starting to waver though and I feel it. Just gotta hold off until he makes it clear to me on his home life. The only thing that is holding everything back is his ex/girlfriend/whatever. I know it took me forever to remove my Ex out of my life, but I don't think I can hold out for another year while he gets his act together. Damn why can't things be easy? Why can't I find a guy that isn't attached? -sighs-
